AfricanColours - Doris' Story - Our Positive Bodies

Kenya Mon 17-03-2008

Doris' Story - Our Positive Bodies
By a Correspondent

I was born in 1969 in Budalangi, Busia district in Western Kenya. I am the seventh child in a family of 13. I attended primary school from 1975 to 1981, and secondary school between 1982 and 1985.

I got married in 1986 and I have two sons: Allan born in 1988 and Joseph born in 1994.

I have known my HIV status since January 1992 . My husband had herpes zoster and we both went for testing at the Aga Khan hospital. We were both shocked when we found out we were both HIV positive that we did not talk for three days.

I only managed to cope through the hospital counsellor and the support from the doctors.

We decided to have another baby in 1994 and that was when I decided to start herbal therapy and I took all types of herbals and food supplements: aloe, African potato and others during my pregnancy.

Thankfully to God, my two sons are HIV negative but in 1995, my husband suffered a stroke and he passed away.

My husband’s family took everything in the house away from me; except utensils and mattresses. It was terrible, I was left stranded but fortunately my family members supported me and rented a house for me.

I then got a job at Blue Grill Hotel in Nairobi and then moved to Express General in Kericho.

During this time I lost my hearing and I had to buy a hearing aid and in 2002 I felt i had the symptoms of malaria and took fansidar- an over the counter anti malarial drug.

I went down completely, doctors thought I had pneumonia and I was put on medication but I continued to get weaker and weaker. I lost my hair and also got a boil on my back.

My mum told my sisters and brothers about my status. My brothers argued that anyone suffering from AIDS cannot get well.

They asked me to be taken back home, to a nearby hospital where I can die so as to reduce the expenses of transporting me back home once i die. I also knew I was dying and I agreed to go but my sister, Theresa, refused to give up on me knowing that I needed to be looked after. Thanks to her, I was left in Nairobi to be treated.

My parish priest realised how sick I was and that I was not able to get proper food. He assisted me financially to get meals and fruits and within a month, I was feeling much better.

I improved a lot and after regaining good strength, my mum took me to Moody Awori- the then Vice president - who then linked me up to workshops to share my experience with others as a person living positive with HIV/Aids.

This really helped me a lot and thanks to these workshops, I got some money and earned a better living.

I remember the days when I was sick, I was stigmatised a lot, even in Church. People did not want to sit next to me. The same priest later asked me what I wanted to do with my life and I said I wanted to train as a VCT counselor.

I was then sponsored to become a VCT counsellor. I am able today to live positively and sustain myself and my children.

When I was first tested, my CD4 was nil but after taking septrin for 2 weeks it rose to three and the doctor started to treat me with ARVs in 2002. After 6 months it shot up to 240.

I was not taking ARVs alone I was also taking African potato, viusid, vitality pack and Aloe vera. Before 2002 I was taking herbals and I was just fine. When I started ARVs, 6months later I could hear and I stopped using hearing aid.

I disclosed to my children when my first-born was in class six. I told them that I am positive. They were 14 years and 8 years. They were very supportive and are still supportive to date.

At the moment I am taking herbal supplements, ARVs, proper nutrition and I get advice and learn a lot through workshops and sharing with other positive lives.

I want to tell everyone that HIV is a tragedy but the best option is VCT for everyone.

How did you feel when you were doing your body map?

I felt sorry for myself because it made me remember what happened to me in 2002. I was really sick and I faced stigma and discrimination from family and friends.

What do the things on your body map mean?

I can start with my head and my ear, it shows when my ear blocked and I have used blue and some black on the sides of my face. In the middle of my heart and my chest there is a candle, which is a sign of my heart, which is the most important part of my body.

It is a strong, and holy and the center that shows something like ribs those are my lungs that were affected by tuberculosis.

The black patch with dots round it symbolizes the boil that turned into a hole at my back. There are sofa sets on my right and left side, which symbolizes my buttocks, which are supporting documents and which are important to me.

What illnesses have you had and how have you treated them? Are they on your body map? Where?

I have shown them on the body map the boils on my vagina shown through some dots in blue. The boil on my back I have shown with black colour and some dots around it and also my chest that shows when TB attacked my lungs. My legs that were itching and had a burning feeling and I could not be able to walk I have shown with yellow fire.

Why have you chosen particular colours to express yourself ?

I have chosen colours especially red because it shows danger. The time I was sick I lost hope in life; I chose blue that means support and everything that supports me and gave me hope. I chose yellow because it is always something that is bright and broad and to show fire and cream too.

I chose black to mean the darkness that was in my lungs when they could not find tuberculosis even after several tests. The black boil on my back I used black as it was very dark and painful and turned into a hole and became serious.

What illnesses/ scars have you painted on your body map?

I started with my ears to show the blockage, my chest to show where TB affected me, also the boil on my back, also the rushes on my legs and the burning feeling and my buttocks, which lost flesh and became like a polythene bag.

What did you paint outside your skin? Why?

I painted red because that red shows danger and the way I was affected and I had lost hope. I was so sick I did not know that I could get up and do my normal duties. The other things like blue also gave me hope in life.

What was the hardest thing to express that you wanted to be a part of your body map?

The hardest thing to express was the boil at my back that turned into a hole and the doctor could even insert the whole of his hand on it and it smell badly.

If you were going to give a name or title for this body map, what would that name be? Why?

I would name it Lazarus because I was meant for death. Lazarus in the bible rose from death and to me I rose from the dead too so this is how I would name it. The process of the body mapping reminded me exactly how I felt when I was sick and it gave me courage to share my experience and find the strenght inside my body.

I love my body map I would like to go to the public and talk to people about it, people to learn what body maps mean and the expression of our affected areas and strong parts in our bodies . It is a good way for people who find it hard to disclose

It really changed my life and the lives of others, it has given us strength. The most successful way of living positive is acceptance and taking proper care of you.

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